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考研英语一2017年大作文真题与例文批改

2017年考研英语一大作文属于典型的图表作文,要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇柱状图批改范例,完整覆盖考研英语一写作技巧常考图表的描述思路,是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。

一、考研英语一2017年大作文题目

考研英语一2017年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and 3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2017年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand cartoon, there is a young individual who lounges in an armchair and boasts that he possesses an extensive collection of books. On the contrary, in the right-hand portrayal, a different young person who drafts an annual reading schedule that includes finishing 20 books devotes himself to concrete plans. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that embracing a pragmatic mindset is the brush that paints a bright future, while indulging in empty fantasies is the shackle that hinders progress.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, adopting a pragmatic approach that aligns actions with goals can ignite our creativity, promote personal growth and self-fulfillment, thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming. On the other hand, succumbing to ungrounded daydreams that lack actionable steps is like a heavy chain that hinders one’s progress, leaving them with a negative outlook on life and preventing them from shining brightly in future society.

In brief, upholding a pragmatic attitude that bridges ambition and execution is the catalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice; additionally, we must be acutely aware of the detrimental effects of the pitfalls of empty daydreaming that derail tangible efforts to ensure our growth stays on course.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文: them

批改:“succumbing to...” 是单数动名词短语作主语,对应的代词应改为 “one”

四、考研英语作文评分

得分:17分

同学你这篇考研作文的表现相当亮眼,能看出你有扎实的语言功底和逻辑思维~

后续提分可以往这几个方向走:

优化长句结构,不用刻意堆长句,复杂定语从句可以拆分(比如把那处长句改成 “By contrast, the young person in the right picture devotes himself to concrete plans: he drafts an annual schedule to finish 20 books”),让句子更流畅。

加 1-2 个小细节支撑论述:在中间段的道理后补个贴合 “读书 / 目标落地” 的小例子,让抽象观点更具体。

整体非常不错,继续保持!加油!

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