面对2016年考研英语一大作文，许多同学最关心的是有没有可复制的写作模板。本文带来的高分范文严格遵循启航考研英语高分框架，从开头引入、主体论证到结尾呼应，全文清晰流畅，是考研英语考生的必备学习资料。

一、考研英语一2016年大作文题目

考研英语一2016年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2016年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand cartoon, there is a father who smokes and indulges in TV, yet he presses his son to dedicate himself to academic efforts. On the contrary, in the right-hand portrayal, both the father and son immerse themselves in their studies—an act that reflects mutual dedication to self-improvement. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that positive role models serve as a brush that paints a bright future for children, whereas negative influences act as shackles that impede their growth.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, while certain Chinese traditions may have faded with time, the value of leading through personal example is one that should never lose its relevance, for it forms an essential bond that sustains the vitality of the Chinese nation. On the other hand, adverse models set by parents are like heavy chains that hinder children’s progress: they foster a pessimistic worldview in the young and bar them from thriving in the society of tomorrow.

In brief, positive role models act as a catalyst for children’s development, a force from which every young person can gain profound benefits. Therefore, we should actively uphold and promote this practice; furthermore, we must remain fully alert to the harmful impacts of negative influences, so that we can guide children’s growth along a healthy and promising path.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：In the left-hand cartoon, there is a father who smokes and indulges in TV, yet he presses his son to dedicate himself to academic efforts. On the contrary, in the right-hand portrayal, both the father and son immerse themselves in their studies—an act that reflects mutual dedication to self-improvement. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that positive role models serve as a brush that paints a bright future for children, whereas negative influences act as shackles that impede their growth.

批改：能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象，并能够直接点明作文的主题。

原文：This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, while certain Chinese traditions may have faded with time, the value of leading through personal example is one that should never lose its relevance, for it forms an essential bond that sustains the vitality of the Chinese nation. On the other hand, adverse models set by parents are like heavy chains that hinder children’s progress: they foster a pessimistic worldview in the young and bar them from thriving in the society of tomorrow.

批改：能够通过正反两方面进行论述来突出论点，能够运用逻辑关系词，使得句子之间衔接较为连贯。

原文：In brief, positive role models act as a catalyst for children’s development, a force from which every young person can gain profound benefits. Therefore, we should actively uphold and promote this practice; furthermore, we must remain fully alert to the harmful impacts of negative influences, so that we can guide children’s growth along a healthy and promising path.

批改：能够提出自己的建议，起到了总结和再次呼应主题的作用。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：19/20

内容切题，全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面，无拼写错误；句式方面，句子结构完整连贯；语法方面，语法基础很好。逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，结构清晰。

修改建议：可以看出作文完成的非常认真，无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰，值得表扬，继续加油。

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