想在短时间内显著提升考研英语写作分数？研读高分范文并接受专业批改是高效的路径。本文整理的2024年考研英语一批改范例，从图表描述、原因分析到建议评论，每一段都渗透着考研英语写作锦囊热点话题的得分要点。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

In the left - hand cartoon, there is a boy standing in the park and saying that it"s wonderful that there is a newly - constructed park near his home. In the right - hand bar chart, the number of parks in the city experienced a significant increase, with the number rising to 264 from 2020 to 2022.

The phenomenon is thought - provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand,in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with mere

material satisfaction; they also pursue physical health.This explains why an increasing number of them choose to exercise in the park, rather than being couch potatoes.On the other hand,as well known,the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives,significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices,Consequently,an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health,as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many parks.

What about future trends? I am confident that the number of exercise participants and that of parks will steadily increase in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：boy

批改：加逗号

批改：开头段内容表达不错，图画和图表内容都很清晰

批改：语法正确

批改：语法正确

原文：experienced a significant increase, with the number rising to 264

批改：此处的表达比较冗余，且是 增加了 264，不是增加到，改为 experienced a significant increase of 264

原文： rather than

批改：后面用的是 being 即 动词ing 的形式，此处改为 instead of 更合适

原文：as well known

批改：此处为从句，是一个完整的句子，改为 as we all know 或者 as is well known

原文：,

批改：此处为句号

原文：,

批改：逗号不能连接两个完整的句子，此处改为 句号

原文：as

批改：前面改为句号后，此处首字母大写

批改：内容表达不错，也比较具体

批改：结尾段表达很好

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15分/20分

题目要求：总体上来说是切题的，表明了个人观点，和图的内容很贴合

语言表达：存在几处语法错误，词汇表达不错，一些句式也很好

结构逻辑：文章的结构完整清晰，内容也比较丰富具体

修改建议：语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改，要细心。之后可以多积累素材，自己多练练句子，进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备，提高自己的语言表达，总的来说写的不错，加油！

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