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2021年考研英语二大作文真题与例文批改

一篇高分的考研英语大作文,常常具备结构清晰、句式多变、词汇地道三大特点。本文精解的2021年考研英语二批改范例,每一段都体现了这三大要素,启航教育考研英语二作文真题教研组对该范文进行了详细的亮点标注。

一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文

2021年大作文:

The bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the ways of exercising of the residents in a certain city. Exercising by themselves takes the lead at 54.3%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family and team activities are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the saying goes, "On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, people are compelled to confront immense life pressure, and as a result, doing exercise has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of people, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文:e bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the ways of exercising of the residents in a certain city. Exercising by themselves takes the lead at 54.3%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family and team activities are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.

批改:你准确地提取并呈现了图表中的核心数据,结构清晰。

原文: core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the saying goes, "On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, people are compelled to confront immense life pressure, and as a result, doing exercise has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改:你从“生活压力”和“新冠疫情”两个角度分析原因,思路是好的。特别是疫情对健康观念的影响,这个点抓得很准。

原文:, doing exercise has eme

批改:doing exercise has emerged as their significant choice -> exercise has become a popular way (“significant choice”稍显生硬)

原文:at about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of people, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

批改:你对未来趋势做出了“保持稳定”的判断,这是一个合理的结论

四、考研英语作文评分

得分:13

总评与建议

你的作文展现了清晰的逻辑结构和扎实的语言功底,能够围绕图表展开论述,这非常棒!为了使文章在考场上更具竞争力,我们可以在以下几个方面稍作提升:

原因分析的贴合度:确保每一个原因分析都能紧密地、直接地解释图表中的核心现象,避免泛泛而谈。

有意识地将一些口语化或略显生硬的表达,替换成更地道的词汇和句式。

想要体验启航教育的考研英语批改服务,只需三步:在线咨询提交作文→资深讲师逐句点评→获取完整批改报告。所有报名2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班的同学,均可享受考研英语二作文真题高分批改服务,名额有限,先到先得。

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