当你坐在考研英语一考场，面对2024年大作文题目的那一瞬间，是否能快速组织起一篇结构清晰、表达地道的高分文章？本文这篇批改例文，正是考研英语一大作文话题下的标准范本，适合每一位考研英语备考生反复研读。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand cartoon, there are two young people, running in a park, while a boy says: "It"s great to have a small park right at the doorstep." Meanwhile, in the right-hand bar chart clearly displays the number of parks in a certain city from 2020 to 2022. In 2020, the number of parks was 406, but by 2022, the figure had substantially risen to 670.

The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the condudtor orchestrating the symphong of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound fitness system for the 15-minute fistness circles, enabling residents to have ample opportunities fitness activities. In addition, as we all know, the outreak of COVID-19 has impocted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing namber of individuals have started paying more attenlion to health.

What about future trends? I am confident that the number of parks is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades. Meanwhile, more and more people will engage in healthy exercise.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：right at the doorstep.

批改：right on the doorstep，介词用on

原文：in

批改：去掉

原文：In the left-hand cartoon, there are two young people, running in a park, while a boy says: "It"s great to have a small park right at the doorstep." Meanwhile, in the right-hand bar chart clearly displays the number of parks in a certain city from 2020 to 2022. In 2020, the number of parks was 406, but by 2022, the figure had substantially risen to 670.

批改：对漫画内容描述的很全面，语言连贯。

原文：reason

批改：复数

原文：condudtor

批改：conductor

原文：symphong

批改：symphony

批改：加to do

原文：attenlion

批改：attention

原文：The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the condudtor orchestrating the symphong of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound fitness system for the 15-minute fistness circles, enabling residents to have ample opportunities fitness activities. In addition, as we all know, the outreak of COVID-19 has impocted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing namber of individuals have started paying more attenlion to health.

批改：论述的内容较为全面，运用逻辑关系词使得句与句之间衔接较为紧密。注意避免小的语言错误。

原文：What about future trends? I am confident that the number of parks is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades. Meanwhile, more and more people will engage in healthy exercise.

批改：能对未来趋势进行预测与分析，与作文主题相符。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：14/20

内容切题，准确全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面，注意避免拼写错误，名词单复数要使用正确；句式方面，要注意句子结构的完整；逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，结构清晰。

修改建议：可以看出作文完成的很认真，无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰，值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节性错误会更好。继续加油。

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