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考研英语一2024年大作文实例分析与批改
2026-08-30 18:14:07
考研英语大作文真题
考研英语真题及答案
备战2024年考研英语大作文,先从研读经典高分范文开始。本文汇集的启航教育批改范文中,不仅有原文、批注,还有词汇注释与亮点解析。准备2027考研的同学,可联系启航教育在线咨询考研英语一写作高分规划。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
The picture and the chart depict a thriving development of urban parks in China.On the left many people are jogging cheerfully in the park,with the boy saying,"This newly-built neighborhood park is excellent."The chant on the right reveal a steady growth of city park numbers in the past three years,surging from 406 in 2020 to 670 in2022.
This relfects the efforts made by many cities to enhance the gentral publics well-being. A growing number of city parks not onl meet residents" needs for healthy lifestyles but also facilitate social interactions.Joggying in the park not only liberates you from the tiredness of a whole-day work, but also fosters community unity.
As China"s urbanization has reached a high level, people"s standards for liveable cities have shifted from high-rise buildings to parks. To better meet city residents"needs for healthier lives, future city planning should take the more city parks in the city
into consideration.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:eople are jogging cheerfully in the park,with the boy saying,"This newly-built neighborhood park is excellent."The chant on the right reveal a steady growth of city park numbers in the past three years,surging from 406 in 2020 to 670 in2022.
批改:开篇堪称典范。语言精准、专业、简洁。用词上,“depict a thriving development", "newly-built neighborhood park", "reveals a steady growth", "surging" 等地道自然。数据描述清晰、全面,句式有变化,且将图片和图表信息完美融合
原文: the park,with the boy saying,"This newly-built neighborhood park is excellent."The chant on the right reveal a steady growth of city park numbers in the past three years,surging f
批改:chant-> chart (拼写错误) in2022-> in 2022 (数字前需加空格)
原文:relfects the efforts made by many cities to enhance the gentral publics well-being. A growing number of city parks not onl meet residents" needs for healthy lifestyles but also facilitate social intera
批改:relfects-> reflects (拼写错误) gentral publics-> general public"s (拼写错误) not onl meet-> not only meet (拼写错误) Joggying-> Jogging (拼写错误) tiredness of a whole-day work-> tiredness of a whole day"s work (更地道的表达)
原文: number of city parks not onl meet residents" needs for healthy lifestyles but also facilitate social interactions.Joggying in the park not only liberates you from the tiredness of a whole-day work, but also fosters community unity.
批改:本段的论证深度和逻辑严密性尤为出色。你从“提升公共福祉”的宏观视角切入,然后具体阐述了公园在满足健康生活方式需求和促进社交互动两方面的价值,逻辑链条清晰有力。特别是将“个人健康”与“社区凝聚力”联系起来,体现了深刻的思考。
原文:liveable cities have shifted from high-rise buildings to parks. To better meet city residents"n
批改:liveable-> livable (两种拼写均可,livable更常见) take the more city parks in the city into consideration-> 表达稍显冗长。可优化为:should give more consideration to building city parks.
原文:ted from high-rise buildings to parks. To better meet city residents"needs for healthier lives, future city planning should take the more city parks in the city into consideration.
批改: 结尾段从城市化发展的背景切入,提出了对未来城市规划的建议,使文章的立意得到了升华
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:16
你的这篇作文有四大突出优点:
语言地道流畅:词汇选择精准且高级,句式丰富多变,衔接自然。
逻辑深度突出:论证不再流于表面,而是建立了具体、深刻、独特的因果链条,体现了很强的思辨能力。
结构严谨完美:从描述到分析再到总结,行文流畅,层次分明。
思想具有前瞻性:结尾段关于宜居城市标准的论述,提升了全文的立意。
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