一篇高分的考研英语大作文，常常具备结构清晰、句式多变、词汇地道三大特点。本文精解的2021年考研英语二批改范例，每一段都体现了这三大要素，启航教育考研英语二作文模板教研组对该范文进行了详细的亮点标注。

一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of physical exercise methoods for residents of acity. Exercising alone takes the lead at 54.3%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family and group activities are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.9%, respectively.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with mere material satisfactions they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of people choose exercising alone rather than other entertainment modes. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVD-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices.Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of the residents, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文： bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of physical exercise methoods for residents of acity. Exercising alone takes the lead at 54.3%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family and group activities are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.9%, respectively.

批改：你对图表数据的描述非常出色，使用了“takes the lead", "followed by", "accounting for...respectively”等一系列专业且地道的表达，数据呈现清晰且有层次，为全文开了个好头。

原文：e core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with mere material satisfactions they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of people choose exercising alone rather than other entertainment modes. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVD-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices.Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：你从“社会进步催生精神需求”和“新冠疫情提升健康意识”两个维度进行分析，视角独特且具有时代感，论证的格局很大，这是本段最大的亮点。

原文：hoose exercising

批改：...choose exercising alone... 动词 choose 后面更常见的搭配是 to do sth. 或直接接名词，因此 choose to exercise alone 是更地道的表达。

原文： COVD-19 h

批改：COVD-19 应为 COVID-19，请留意拼写。

原文：methoods for

批改：methoods 是 methods 的拼写错误。 acity 应为 a city，中间需要加一个空格

原文：about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of the residents, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

批改：你对未来趋势做出了合理的判断，并且用“a microcosm of the changes in the era”这样凝练的表述进行总结，提升了文章的立意，结尾非常有力。

原文：the choice of the re

批改：...the choice of the residents... 由于居民的选择是多种多样的，这里使用复数形式 choices 更为准确。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：12

评分理由：

你的这篇作文在内容和结构上完成了非常出色的任务：

内容与结构：完整涵盖了数据描述、原因分析和趋势预测，逻辑链条清晰，结构严谨。

词汇与语法：熟练运用了“microcosm", "in the wake of", "high-speed advancement”等高级词汇和复杂句式，语言功底扎实。

衔接与连贯：使用“To start with", "In addition", "Consequently”等衔接词，使行文流畅，论证层层递进。

目前存在的主要是一些细微的语法、拼写和用词问题，它们不影响理解，但影响了表达的精准度。

总评与修改建议：

建议是：

聚焦“句子边界”：请特别留意那些长的、包含多个意群的句子。在写完这样的句子后，检查一下中间是否有逗号粘连了两个可以独立的句子。这是通向地道英文书写的一个关键步骤。

进行“精准度”专项检查：在完成全文后，可以快速扫描一遍，专门检查：① 专有名词（如COVID-19）的拼写；② 抽象名词（如satisfaction）的可数性；③ 动词的固定搭配（如choose to do）。

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