对于考研英语一而言，2016年大作文常以图画形式呈现。本文精解的这篇图画批改范例，启航教育老师逐句解读图画细节、寓意提炼与评论展开三步走，是考研英语作文话题图画作文的经典教学样本。

一、考研英语二2016年大作文题目

考研英语二2016年大作文Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.

二、考研英语二2016年大作文批改例文

The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of intention of tourist among students at a certain university. Diffusing pressure takes the lead at 33%, followed by watching view at 37%. Additionally factors such as making friends,

making independent ability and other factors are also accounting for 9%,6%and 15%,respectively.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the saying goes,"On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, tourists has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society,people are no longer content with mere material statisfaction;they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of students choose tourist.

What about future trends? I am confident that the above sceptical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of students. serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely

remain relatively stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：hing view

批改：watching view -> sightseeing 或 enjoying the scenery (固定搭配错误)

原文：ing independent ability

批改：making independent ability -> developing independence 或 cultivating independent ability (搭配不当)

原文：e chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of intention of tourist among students at a certain university. Diffusing pressure takes the lead at 33%, followed by watching view at 37%. Additionally factors such as making friends, making independent ability and other factors are also accounting for 9%,6%and 15%,respectively.

批改：段准确地列出了所有数据，完成了图表描述的核心任务。

原文：erged as

批改：tourists has emerged -> tourism has emerged 或 travel has emerged (主谓不一致，tourists是游客，此处应为tourism旅游业或travel旅行行为)

原文：tatisfactio

批改：material statisfaction -> material satisfaction (拼写错误)

原文：oose tourist

批改：choose tourist -> choose to travel (同上，tourist是名词“游客”，此处应用动词travel)

原文：core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the saying goes,"On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, tourists has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society,people are no longer content with mere material statisfaction;they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. This explains why an increasing number of students choose tour

批改：本段从“缓解压力”和“追求精神享受”两个角度分析原因，思路非常正确，且与图表数据高度相关

原文：ceptical fig

批改：sceptical figures -> statistical figures (严重的拼写错误，sceptical意为“怀疑的”，完全改变了句意)

原文：ct the choice of studen

批改：the choice of students -> the choices of students (指代学生的多种旅游目的，应用复数)

原文：hat about future trends? I am confident that the above sceptical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of students. serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

批改：

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11分

总评：

同学，你好！这篇作文让我看到了你清晰的写作思路和良好的逻辑结构，这非常棒！你离高分作文已经很近了，当前的主要挑战在于语言的精准度。

1. 语言方面：

你的主要失分点在于核心词汇的准确使用。文中出现了几处影响理解的用词错误（如tourist/tourism/travel, sceptical/statistical）和搭配错误（如watching view）。这提示我们需要一个“核心概念词汇表”，确保在考场上对关键术语的使用万无一失。

2. 结构方面：

你的文章结构非常稳健，三段分别完美对应题目要求，且分析段的论点选择都十分贴切。这是你的巨大优势！

总的修改建议：

打造精准词库：请重点记忆并区分以下核心词汇：

旅行行为：travel (v./n.), tourism (n., 旅游业)

旅行目的：travel purposes / purposes for traveling

缓解压力：relieve pressure / reduce stress欣赏风景：go sightseeing / enjoy the scenery

统计数据：statistical figures / data

写完必检查：完成初稿后，请务必留出3-5分钟，专门排查以上核心词汇的拼写和使用是否正确。

考研英语作文话题写作提分高效的方式，是让经验丰富的老师亲自批改你的作文。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班，主讲斌哥亲批每一份学员作业，真题作业批改、轻松应对各种复杂题目，让考研英语写作更有底。