作为考研英语备考的核心模块，2011年考研英语二大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文，紧扣考研英语二大作文常见话题，由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改，详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点，是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。

一、2011年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2011年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart and 2) give your comments. You should write at least 150 words. Write your essay on ANSWER SHEET 2. (15 points)

二、2011年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart clearly depicts the share of the market at a part of the brand in the Chinese market of car in 2008 and 2009. In 2008, the percentage of China brand was approximately 25%, but by 2009, this rate had substantially risen to around 30%. In contrast, the proportion of Japen brand experienced a significant decline of about 10% during the same period. Meanwhile, the percantage of America brand remained stable and steady.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, Chinere society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the significant progess made by China"s car manufacturing industry in responding to these changes. In addition, against the backdrop of our country"s rapid and dynamic development, the younger generation, particularly those born in the 1990s,are accustomed to using dometic car and have become the primary consumer group. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I am confident that the proportion of China brand will steadily increase in the following decades. In contrast, the proportion of Japen and American brand will likely continue to decrease.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：the share of the market at a part of the brand in the Chinese market of car

批改：表达冗余，改为the market share of some car brands in Chinese car market

原文：percantage

批改：percentage

原文：Japen

批改：Japanese

原文：America brand

批改：American brands

原文：China brand

批改：Chinese brands

原文：The bar chart clearly depicts the share of the market at a part of the brand in the Chinese market of car in 2008 and 2009. In 2008, the percentage of China brand was approximately 25%, but by 2009, this rate had substantially risen to around 30%. In contrast, the proportion of Japen brand experienced a significant decline of about 10% during the same period. Meanwhile, the percantage of America brand remained stable and steady.

批改：信息描述准确，但用词不准

原文： Chinere

批改：Chinese

原文：progess

批改：progress

原文：dometic car

批改：domestic cars

原文： China brand

批改：Chinese brands

原文：apen and American brand

批改：Japanese and American brands​​

原文：The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, Chinere society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the significant progess made by China"s car manufacturing industry in responding to these changes. In addition, against the backdrop of our country"s rapid and dynamic development, the younger generation, particularly those born in the 1990s,are accustomed to using dometic car and have become the primary consumer group. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：词汇和句型够用

原文：What about future trends? I am confident that the proportion of China brand will steadily increase in the following decades. In contrast, the proportion of Japen and American brand will likely continue to decrease.

批改：good

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：9/15

1.作文内容包含全面，主题明确，分段清晰；

2.应用的语法结构和词汇丰富，非谓语结构、宾语从句和which定语从句都有体现，注意拼写和搭配错误。

3.衔接顺序自然，层次分明，逻辑词使用很棒。

4.要内化老师讲的高分词汇和模板句型，成为自己的写作财富，加油！

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