本文精选了一篇得分13分以上的2013年考研英语一大作文高分范例，并附启航老师对该范文的逐句批改。文中清晰展示了考研英语写作技巧评分细则中关于语法多样性、词汇丰富度与逻辑连贯性的得分技巧，是考研英语学习的高价值内容。

一、考研英语一2013年大作文题目

考研英语一2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly, 2) interpret its intended meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2013年大作文批改例文

As shown in the picture, there are many graduates making choices, which include job-hunting, going abroad and starting business. Evidently, the picture intends to convey to readers that choosing plays an important and positive role in our personal lives and in society.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, choosing a suitable path can ignite our creativity, and promote personal growth and fulfillment, thus making lives meaningful and rewarding, rather than being self-consuming. On the other hand, choosing a false path is like a heavy chain that hinders our progress, depriving our ability to think independently and preventing ourselves from shining brightly in future society.

In brief, choosing the right path is the catalyst for social and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we develop individual potential and fulfill our aspirations.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：starting business

批改：starting a business

原文：which include job-hunting, going abroad and starting business.

批改：漏掉了 “考研” 路径

原文： depriving our ability

批改：“deprive sb. of sth.” 为固定结构 depriving us of the ability

原文：preventing ourselves

批改：preventing us

原文：social and personal development

批改：最好先个人再社会，符合逻辑：personal and social development

原文：there are many graduates making choices

批改：可以拓展为a group of graduates stand at a crossroads...更生动

原文：This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant

批改：这句话比较大众，但是不会出错。如果想要突出一点的话，可以写成Such a scenario highlights that the quality of our choices carries profound implications, and two dimensions merit close attention.

原文：false path

批改：改为inappropriate path会更好些。道路没有对错之分，只有适合不适合自己的区别。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：14/20

1.题目要求：字数符合题目要求。文章需要分析图画并表明观点，符合题目要求。

2.语言表达：语言表达清晰，但存在一些语法错误和拼写错误，考生需注意。

3.内容层面：包含题目要求的内容。

4.修改意见：文章整体较完整，结构较为清晰，按照描述漫画、阐述哲理和提出呼吁的顺序进行写作。然而存在一些语法错误和拼写错误，考生需多加注意。另外可以多学习范文和模板句，进一步提高语言表达能力。

本文精解的2013年考研英语一范文，在启航教育AI智能批改系统中拿到了高分评价。快速揪出失分点，对着薄弱点学提升更快，是考研英语写作技巧备考的贴心帮手。扫码预约，免费体验考研英语作文AI智能批改。