考研英语作文失分点多、提分空间大，一直是2021年考研英语二备考生核心痛点之一。本文围绕考研英语二作文范文话题，给出一篇经过启航教育老师精细批改的高分范文，文中不仅有逐句批注，还附有可复制的考研英语二高分写作模板。

一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The picture clearly depicts the breakdown percentage of the ways to exercise among the residents in certain cities. The proportion of exercising alone taked the lead at 54.3％,followed by doing sports with friends at 47.7％. Additionally these factors such as training with family or a group are considered,accounting for 23％and 15.8％ respectively.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follow. As we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our life,significantly altering people"s minds and being start to pay more attention to keep healthy. What"s more,our government make the tremendous efforts to build many great infrastructure,enabling people to have ample fields to do sports. Considering these factors ,the depicted phenomenon is not surprising.

What about the future trend? I am confident that this statistical figures truthfully reflect the choices of people,serving as a microcosm of social change.It wil likely remain stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：picture

批改：改为 “The chart”（图表作文需明确 “图表” 类型）

原文：breakdown percentage

批改：语序错误，应为 “percentage breakdown”（“比例分布” 固定表达）

原文：taked

批改：“takes”（一般现在时，描述图表数据客观事实）

原文：as follow

批改：改为 “as follows”（“如下” 固定表达，复数形式）

原文：our life

批改：改为 “our lives”（复数形式）

原文：being start to pay

批改：结构混乱，改为 “prompting them to pay”（现在分词作伴随状语，“prompt” 表 “促使”，逻辑更顺）

原文：this statistical figures

批改：“these statistics”（“statistics” 为复数，对应 “these”，删除冗余的 “statistical”）

原文：wil

批改：“will”

原文：The picture clearly depicts the breakdown percentage of the ways to exercise among the residents in certain cities. The proportion of exercising alone taked the lead at 54.3％,followed by doing sports with friends at 47.7％. Additionally these factors such as training with family or a group are considered,accounting for 23％and 15.8％ respectively.

批改：描述图表内容，符合题目要求

原文：The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follow. As we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our life,significantly altering people"s minds and being start to pay more attention to keep healthy. What"s more,our government make the tremendous efforts to build many great infrastructure,enabling people to have ample fields to do sports. Considering these factors ,the depicted phenomenon is not surprising.

批改：提出了自己的观点，使用了表示逻辑关系的连接词，条理较为清晰

原文：What about the future trend? I am confident that this statistical figures truthfully reflect the choices of people,serving as a microcosm of social change.It wil likely remain stable in the following decades.

批改：预测未来趋势，符合结尾段的内容和结构

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11

原文框架完整，准确捕捉了 “某城市居民锻炼方式比例分布” 的核心数据（独自锻炼占比最高，与朋友 / 家人锻炼、团体训练占比次之），具备图表作文基本结构。但存在一些问题：语法 / 拼写错误频发（如 “taked”“follow”“wil”），写完再整体检查一遍，希望继续努力，加油！

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