本文精选了一篇得分13分以上的2024年考研英语一大作文高分范例，并附启航老师对该范文的逐句批改。文中清晰展示了考研英语写作锦囊评分细则中关于语法多样性、词汇丰富度与逻辑连贯性的得分技巧，是考研英语学习的高价值内容。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand picture,lots of people are running in the new park and a youngster says “The park built recently is wonderful.”In the right-hand picture,in 2020,the number of park was 406,but by 2022,the figure of park had substantially risen to 670.

The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,as the conductor orchestrating the symphony changes,our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound park system ,enabling civilian to have ample opportunities to exercise.In addition,outbreak of the COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering our lives,significantly altering people’s behaviors and choices.Consequently,an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health.

What about future trends?I am confident that the number of park will steadily increase in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：e number of park

批改：“the number of park”应为“the number of parks”，需要使用复数形式。

原文：e left-hand picture,lots of people are running in the new park and a youngster says “The park built recently is wonderful.”In the right-hand picture,in 2020,the number of park was 406,but by 2022,the figure of park had substantially risen to 670.

批改：你成功地将漫画场景与图表数据结合起来，完成了引入话题的任务

原文： core reason

批改：“reason”在语境中应用复数“reasons”，因为后面提到了多个原因。

原文：mphony changes,

批改：“symphony changes”应为“symphony of changes”。

原文： core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,as the conductor orchestrating the symphony changes,our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound park system ,enabling civilian to have ample opportunities to exercise.In addition,outbreak of the COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering our lives,significantly altering people’s behaviors and choices.Cons

批改：：原因分析段的结构很好，从政府作为和疫情影响两个角度展开

原文：e number of park

批改：“the number of park”应改为“the number of parks”

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15分

总分与总评

这篇作文较好地完成了试题规定的任务，结构清晰。但在语法结构和词汇准确性方面存在一些错误。

总评与修改建议：

这篇作文最值得称赞的地方是清晰的论述结构和结合漫画与图表的分析思路。你能够从两个不同的信息源中提取关键信息并建立联系，这体现了良好的综合分析能力。

为你接下来的练习提两个小建议：

提升语言细节的准确性：请特别关注名词的单复数形式（如parks）和冠词的使用（如the）。写作后可以快速检查这些基础语法点。

优化句子之间的衔接：在段落内部和段落之间使用适当的过渡词，能让你的文章逻辑更流畅、更有条理。

本文精解的2024年考研英语一范文，在启航教育AI智能批改系统中拿到了高分评价。快速揪出失分点，对着薄弱点学提升更快，是考研英语写作锦囊备考的贴心帮手。扫码预约，免费体验考研英语作文AI智能批改。