本文将启航教育一对一批改过的2021年考研英语一高分范文进行公开呈现。批改老师对文中每一个失分细节进行了精确标注，对照考研英语写作模板热点话题与评分细则，你可以快速了解考研英语写作的提分方向。

一、2021年考研英语一大作文题目

考研英语一2021年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the picture below. In your essay, you should1)describe the picture briefly, 2)interpret the implied meaning, and 3)give your comments. Write your answer on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、2021年考研英语一大作文批改例文

As shown in the cartoon, there is a youngboy, wearing Monkey King clothes and saying to his father. "Dad, my classmates think learning opera is bring. "His father sald "If you like it, it is enough" Evidently, the cartoonist instends to cavey to readers that it is sticking to oneself that play an important role bothin our personal lives andin society

The phenomenon is thought-provoking in serveral ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, in mordern society full of changes sticking to oneself has become a key quality that distinguishes exceptional individuals and ordimary people, its significante has become increasing evident. and on the other hand, striking to oneself can ignite our creativity and promote personal growth and self-fulfillment.

In brief, striking to oneself is a cutalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this quality Only by doing so can we develop individual potential and fulfill our aspirations.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：youngboy

批改：这是两个单词，注意空格

原文：bring

批改：boring

原文：sald

批改：says 注意时态一致

原文： instends

批改：intends

原文：cavey

批改：convey

原文： play

批改：plays

原文：bothin

批改：注意空格

原文： andin

批改：注意空格

原文：As shown in the cartoon, there is a youngboy, wearing Monkey King clothes and saying to his father. "Dad, my classmates think learning opera is bring. "His father sald "If you like it, it is enough" Evidently, the cartoonist instends to cavey to readers that it is sticking to oneself that play an important role bothin our personal lives andin society

批改：描述漫画内容，揭示漫画背后所反映的社会现象和深刻哲理，清晰直观。

原文：mordern

批改：modern

原文： and

批改：from

原文：ordimary

批改：ordinary

原文： significante

批改： significance

原文：increasing

批改：increasingly

原文：striking

批改：sticking

原文：The phenomenon is thought-provoking in serveral ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, in mordern society full of changes sticking to oneself has become a key quality that distinguishes exceptional individuals and ordimary people, its significante has become increasing evident. and on the other hand, striking to oneself can ignite our creativity and promote personal growth and self-fulfillment.

批改：以分论点的形式论述坚持自我的重要性，逻辑严谨，层次分明。

原文：striking

批改：sticking

原文：cutalyst

批改：catalyst

原文：this quality

批改：补充句号

原文：n brief, striking to oneself is a cutalyst for societal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this quality Only by doing so can we develop individual potential and fulfill our aspirations.

批改：总结全文，升华主题

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：13/20

作文对漫画的理解到位，写作思路紧扣主题，有些短语句式的表达也不错，基本能够传达清楚作者的写作意图，但在以下几方面还需注意：

1.语法：个别句子从汉语角度看意思通顺，仔细分析其实句子成分不完整，不符合英语表达方式。

2.细节：作文中有几处比较明显的拼写错误。考试时可以多积累高级词汇，写作文就能用上，但尤其注意单词拼写不要出现明显错误，特别是与主题词相关的单词要重点留意。

3.内容：本文可以从以下多个角度入手展开：坚持做自己喜欢的事情、自信、独立思考、不盲从、父母正确鼓励孩子等，用人生观的角度，都比较好展开；但如果只写传统文化，未涉及上述内容，就偏题了。

整体来看，作文理解了漫画内涵，段落框架明确，大体上与题目要求保持一致，但是在表达上还存在一定问题。从点评中可以看出作文中有一些表述不当之处，基本是由汉语思维习惯而造成的表达错误，主要体现在词汇使用和搭配不当，句子成分缺失混乱，同时也有一些时态和前后一致等细节问题，后续继续注重练习，加油！

读懂范文只是第一步，写出高分作文才是关键。启航教育提供考研英语作文免费批改服务，由资深讲师逐句点评，让你清晰掌握考研英语写作模板写作锦囊的核心要点。2027考研英语备考，从一篇专业批改开始。