当你坐在考研英语二考场，面对2013年大作文题目的那一瞬间，是否能快速组织起一篇结构清晰、表达地道的高分文章？本文这篇批改例文，正是考研英语二写作冲刺话题下的标准范本，适合每一位考研英语备考生反复研读。

一、2013年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2013年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the part-time situation of college students at a certain university .Year 4 takes the lead at 88.24%,followed by Year 3 at 71.93%.Additionally,factors such as Year 2 and Year 1 are also considered ,accounting for 71.13%and 67.77% respectively .

The core reasons for the observed phenomenons can be summarize as follows.To start with , the gradual increase from freshman to junior year can be attributed to students’ growing adaptability to campus life,increased the financial needs and the stronger desire to gain practical work in experience. In addition to sharp decline in the final year is almost certainly linked to the overwhelming prior to academic commitments Senior are typically preoccupied with completing their graduate is preparing for postgraduate in trans exam or actively seeking full-time employment, leaving them with a little time and all energy for part-time work

what about future trans? I am confident that the above stand figures accurately, and truthfully reflect the choice of the part time serving as microcosm over the chancein the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades .

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：Year 4

批改：大四表示为senior students，改成：the proportion of senior students

原文：Year 3

批改：大三junior students，改成：the proportion of junior students

原文：Year 2

批改：改成：the proportion of sophomore students

原文：Year 1

批改：改成：the proportion of freshmen

原文：he bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the part-time situation of college students at a certain university .Year 4 takes the lead at 88.24%,followed by Year 3 at 71.93%.Additionally,factors such as Year 2 and Year 1 are also considered ,accounting for 71.13%and 67.77% respectively

批改：要注意大一到大四的正确表达

原文：phenomenons

批改：phenomenon

原文：summarize

批改：改成被动summarized

原文：In addition to

批改：in addition后加逗号，to去掉

原文：overwhelming prior

批改：overwhelming后应该修饰名词，而且前后含义不搭

原文：commitments

批改：一句话说完要用句号断句

原文：Senior

批改：senior students，在这里加个who构成定语从句，否则这句话前后出现两个谓语

原文：graduate

批改：改成名词graduation

原文：is

批改：改成are

原文：in trans

批改：多余，删去

原文：all

批改：改成less，表否定

原文：he core reasons for the observed phenomenons can be summarize as follows.To start with , the gradual increase from freshman to junior year can be attributed to students’ growing adaptability to campus life,increased the financial needs and the stronger desire to gain practical work in experience. In addition to sharp decline in the final year is almost certainly linked to the overwhelming prior to academic commitments Senior are typically preoccupied with completing their graduate is preparing for postgraduate in trans exam or actively seeking full-time employment, leaving them with a little time and all energy for part-time work

批改：能够运用逻辑关系词对图表中的现象进行分析论述，注意避免小的语言错误。

原文：what

批改：W大写

原文：stand

批改：statistical

原文：,

批改：逗号去掉

原文：part time

批改：students后加逗号

原文：sharp

批改：sharp前加the表特指

原文：what about future trans? I am confident that the above stand figures accurately, and truthfully reflect the choice of the part time serving as microcosm over the chancein the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades .

批改：分析并预测了未来的趋势，言简意赅。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：7/15

1）内容符合题目的要求，能够准确全面的描绘出图表中的内容。

2）词汇方面，基础词汇一定要避免拼写错误，要熟悉大一到大四单词的写法；句式和语法方面，注意主被动关系正确以及一句话只能有一个谓语。

3）逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，符合英语句子结构的要求。

4）修改建议：内容充分，语言逻辑清晰，值得表扬。但是一定要细心一些，注意避免以上小的语法问题。再接再厉。

学习考研英语写作不是一个人的战斗。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班配套研友社群，主讲在线答疑、批改反馈、打卡提醒，全程陪伴你的考研英语二写作冲刺备考之路。欢迎添加在线咨询老师，了解最新开班信息。