思想品质、教育文化是考研英语大作文的高频命题方向，本文呈现的2013年考研英语二批改范例正是聚焦这一主旨。启航教育老师透过文章结构、衔接表达和结尾升华三方面，逐段展示了一篇考研英语写作冲刺高分范文的诞生过程。

一、2013年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2013年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart clearly depicts part-time work among students in certain university. In Grade one, the percentage of students was 67.77%. but by Grade two, this rate had gradually risen to 71.13% Meanwhile. the percentage experienced a significant increase of 16.3%,during Grade three to Grade four.Simultaneously, the proportion of students remained stable and steady from Grade two to Grade three. The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with. As the saying goes," on life"s stage, pressure is always present". Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense employment pressure, and as a result，doing part-time work has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, An increasing number of young people believe that in modern society full of changes, chances, and challenges, practice is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run.

What abont future trends? I am confident that the proportion of students in Grade four will steadily increase in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

批改：加上：the proportion of

原文：Grade one

批改：大一freshman year

原文：students

批改：后加taking part-time jobs

原文：Grade two

批改：大二sophomore year

原文：Grade three

批改：大三junior year

原文：Grade four.

批改：大四senior year

批改：后加taking part-time jobs

原文：Grade two to Grade three

批改：sophomore year to junior year

原文：with.

批改：with后加逗号，不是句号

原文：As

批改：as小写

原文：An

批改：an小写

原文：The bar chart clearly depicts part-time work among students in certain university. In Grade one, the percentage of students was 67.77%. but by Grade two, this rate had gradually risen to 71.13% Meanwhile. the percentage experienced a significant increase of 16.3%,during Grade three to Grade four.Simultaneously, the proportion of students remained stable and steady from Grade two to Grade three. The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with. As the saying goes," on life"s stage, pressure is always present". Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense employment pressure, and as a result，doing part-time work has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, An increasing number of young people believe that in modern society full of changes, chances, and challenges, practice is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run.

批改：建议将描述图表的信息和论述原因分成两段进行，使得结构更加清晰

原文：in Grade four

批改：改成taking part-time jobs in senior year

原文：What abont future trends? I am confident that the proportion of students in Grade four will steadily increase in the following decades.

批改：分析并预测了未来的趋势，言简意赅。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：10/15

1）内容符合题目的要求，能够准确全面的描绘出图表中的内容。

2）词汇方面，注意大一到大四的正确词汇表达；句式方面，能够运用一些复杂句式，句型结构灵活多变，但是要注意句子结构的完整，不要缺少成分；语法方面，总体来看语法基础还不错。

3）逻辑结构清晰完整，论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子，符合英语句子结构的要求。

4）修改建议：可以看出作文完成的比较认真，内容充分，语言逻辑清晰，值得表扬。一定要细心一些，注意避免以上小的细节问题。再接再厉。

启航教育考研英语批改服务累计已帮助众多考生实现写作提分。本文精解的2013年考研英语二范文，正是来自启航教育写作批改的真实案例。想要获得同样专业的批改，扫描页面二维码或在线咨询即可预约考研英语写作冲刺免费批改名额。