考研英语写作想要突破20分瓶颈，仅靠背诵远远不够，必须通过范文精读+专业批改双管齐下。本文带来的2023年考研英语二高分批改范例，涵盖考研英语二写作冲刺高频常考话题，逐句逐段剖析高分背后的逻辑链条。

一、2023年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2023年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe and interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. Write your answer in about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2023年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The line chart clearly depicts the level of health literacy among residents in China from 2012 to 2021, the level of health literacy was 8.8%, but by 2021, this rate had substantially risen to25.4%

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the significant progress phenomenon was made by China"s healthcare industry in responding to these changes. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID- 19 has impacted every aspect of our lives,significant altering people"s choices and behaviors Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health .Considering these factors the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I am confident that the health literacy level is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：e chart clearly depicts the level of health literacy among residents in China from 2012 to 2021, the level of health literacy was 8.8%, but by 2021, this rate had substantially risen to25.4%

批改：你准确地抓住了图表的核心信息。

原文：arly depicts the level of health literacy among residents in China from 2012 to 2021, the level of health liter

批改：句子结构问题：这里用一个逗号连接了两个完整的句子，造成了“逗号粘连”错误。可以修改为：The line chart clearly depicts the level of health literacy among residents in China from 2012 to 2021. In 2012, the level was 8.8%, but by 2021, this rate had substantially risen to 25.4%.

原文：icant progress phenomenon was made by China"s healthcare industry in responding to these changes. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID- 19 has impacted every aspect of our lives,significant

批改：the significant progress phenomenon was made-> 这个表达可以更简洁、主动：China"s healthcare industry has made significant progress in responding to these changes.​ (删除“phenomenon”，使用现在完成时) COVID- 19-> COVID-19​ (删除空格) lives,significant altering-> lives, significantly altering​ (逗号后加空格，并用副词significantly修饰动词altering) behaviors Consequently-> behaviors. Consequently,​ (这是另一个“逗号粘连”错误，应断句) health .Considering-> health. Considering​ (句号后加空格) factors the-> factors, the​ (缺少逗号)

原文：se society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the significant progress phenomenon was made by China"s healthcare industry in responding to these changes. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID- 19 has impacted every aspect of our lives,significant altering people"s choices and behaviors Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health .Considering these factors the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改： 本段从社会转型/医疗进步和新冠疫情两个角度分析原因，这个思路是很好的，特别是提到新冠疫情，非常切题。可以进一步提升的地方是第一个原因的清晰度。“社会转型”是一个比较宽泛的概念，可以更直接地说明是医疗体系的进步（如健康教育的普及）直接促进了居民健康素养的提升

原文：ture trends? I am confident that the health literacy level is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the follow

批改：结尾段简洁地做出了预测，这很好。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11

你的作文最需要关注的是句子结构的完整性和逻辑衔接的清晰度。“逗号粘连”是当前影响文章流畅性的主要问题。同时，在分析原因时，可以尝试让论点更具体、更直接地解释图表现象。

总的修改建议：

检查句子边界：写完每个句子后，确认它是否是一个完整的思想。如果是两个完整的思想，用句号或合适的连词（如and, but, because）分开。

让论证更聚焦：问自己“这个原因是如何直接导致健康素养提升的？”，这能帮助你的分析更切中要害。

本文展示的2023年考研英语二范文可以提炼为考研英语二写作冲刺的写作模板灵活复用。启航教育写作教研组归纳了6类常考话题高分模板，均纳入2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班，助你一次掌握考研英语作文的得分密码。