作为考研英语备考的核心模块，2024年考研英语一大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文，紧扣考研英语一写作技巧常见话题，由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改，详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点，是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

As shown in the cartoon, there is a boy standing in a park, and saying "It"s better to have a park which built nearby ."Simultaneously, in the right - hand bar chart, the number of parks in a certain city experienced a significant increase of 246 from 2020 to 2022.

The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, people are no longer content with mere material satistaction,they also pursue physical healthy. This explains why an increasing number of people choose to exercise in the park. In addition, as the conducter orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many parks, enabling citizens to exercise freely. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends ? I am confident that the number of exercise participants and parks will steadily increase in the following decades

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：built

批改：被动式前面要加 is

原文： -

批改：前后空格应删除

原文：of

批改：表示数量增长介词用by更恰当

原文：As shown in the cartoon, there is a boy standing in a park, and saying "It"s better to have a park which built nearby ."Simultaneously, in the right - hand bar chart, the number of parks in a certain city experienced a significant increase of 246 from 2020 to 2022.

批改：描述出了漫画和图表中的关键信息，注意个别语法问题

原文：satistaction

批改：satisfaction

原文：they

批改：前面要加 连词 and连接两个句子

原文：healthy

批改：要用名词 health

原文：conducter

批改：conductor

批改：空格应删除

原文：The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, people are no longer content with mere material satistaction,they also pursue physical healthy. This explains why an increasing number of people choose to exercise in the park. In addition, as the conducter orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many parks, enabling citizens to exercise freely. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：从健康需求和政府举措两方面分析了建设公园的意义，注意个别单词拼写

原文：What about future trends ? I am confident that the number of exercise participants and parks will steadily increase in the following decades

批改：表达个人观点，最后记得加 句号

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：17/20

题目要求：对漫画和图表的描述较为准确，个人观点及论述内容符合题意；

语言表达：全文用了较多的模板句，仅有个别拼写问题和语法问题，整体上表达较为通顺；

行文逻辑：第一段描述题干内容，第二段给出详细论述，第三段表达个人观点，整体架构完整；

修改建议：改正原文错误；继续积累经典句式；加强单词复习；

整体来说还不错，继续加油~

读完本文，你对2024年考研英语一大作文的考研英语一写作技巧写作思路是否有了更清晰的把握？启航教育为2027考研人整理的考研英语写作高分资料包，包含近年真题、高分模板、热点话题预测，在线咨询即可免费领取。