本文将启航教育一对一批改过的2011年考研英语二高分范文进行公开呈现。批改老师对文中每一个失分细节进行了精确标注，对照考研英语作文批改热点话题与评分细则，你可以快速了解考研英语写作的提分方向。

一、2011年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2011年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart and 2) give your comments. You should write at least 150 words. Write your essay on ANSWER SHEET 2. (15 points)

二、2011年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart clearly depicts the market share of some demestic car brands in the domestic car markcets in 2008 and 2009.

In 2008, the percentage of American brand automobiles was 35%, but by 2009, this rate has substantially decreased to about 25%. Meanwhile, the proportion of Chineses brand automobiles experienced a significant increased about 8%. from 2008 to 2009. Simultaneously, the percentage of Japanese brand automobiles remained stable and steady.

The core reason for the olserved phenomenion can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevate the purchasing power of the populace, allowing them to afford automobiles that were previously deemed luzury items. In addition, against the backdop of our country"s ropid and dynamic development, the younger generation, particularly those born in the 1990s and 2000s, are accustomed to buying domestic autormobiles and have become the primary consumer group. Considering the factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about future trends? I am confident that proportion of demestic autormobiles will steadily increase in followins decades. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese brand automobiles will likely continue to remain relatively stable

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：markcets

批改：market

原文：increased

批改：increase of

原文：The bar chart clearly depicts the market share of some demestic car brands in the domestic car markcets in 2008 and 2009. In 2008, the percentage of American brand automobiles was 35%, but by 2009, this rate has substantially decreased to about 25%. Meanwhile, the proportion of Chineses brand automobiles experienced a significant increased about 8%. from 2008 to 2009. Simultaneously, the percentage of Japanese brand automobiles remained stable and steady.

批改：用具体数据描述图表内容，清晰直观，但是建议在段落后面补充这些数据反映的社会现象

原文：olserved

批改：observed

原文：ropid

批改：rapid

原文：The core reason for the olserved phenomenion can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevate the purchasing power of the populace, allowing them to afford automobiles that were previously deemed luzury items. In addition, against the backdop of our country"s ropid and dynamic development, the younger generation, particularly those born in the 1990s and 2000s, are accustomed to buying domestic autormobiles and have become the primary consumer group. Considering the factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

批改：以分论点的形式论述这一现象背后的原因，逻辑严谨，层次分明。

原文：autormobiles

批改：automobiles

原文：followins

批改：following

原文：What about future trends? I am confident that proportion of demestic autormobiles will steadily increase in followins decades. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese brand automobiles will likely continue to remain relatively stable

批改：总结全文，升华主题，展望未来，立意深远

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：12 /15

这篇文章内容完整充实，结构清晰合理，逻辑严谨，层次分明，句型表达丰富。

词汇：考试时可以多积累高级词汇，写作文就能用上，但尤其注意单词拼写不要出现明显错误，特别是与主题词相关的单词要重点留意。

内容：在第二段分析原因时，我们可以有两个选择，一是只分析中国品牌占比上升的原因，二是可以加上日本品牌占比下降的原因，关于日本品牌占比下降的原因，可以写日本品牌一些不当行为导致其声誉下降，进而影响其销量等原因。

整体来看，主要是细节错误，后续继续注重练习，加油！

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