考研英语二写作冲刺每年的命题都会折射出当年的社会热点。本文呈现的2011年考研英语二批改范例，从生活实际出发，紧扣命题意图。启航教育老师在批注中详细指出了图（表）描述、原因分析与建议评论的合理答题节奏。

一、2011年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2011年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart and 2) give your comments. You should write at least 150 words. Write your essay on ANSWER SHEET 2. (15 points)

二、2011年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart depicts the brand market of domestic car market during 2008 to 2009. In 2008, the percentage of domestic brand was approximately 25%, but by 2009 this rate had substantially risen to around 32%. Meanwhile, the proportion of American brand experienced a significant decline of about 10% during the same period. Simultancously, the percentage of Janpan brand remained stable and steady.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows, To start with, in the wake of the high-speed improvement of society, people"s attitude towards of consumption have undergone significant changes. People are no longer content with material satisfication, they also pursue Chinese national spirit.This explains why an increasing number of people choose domestic cars rather than foreign cars. In addition, chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the great progress made by China"s manufacturing industry. And the economic growth rapidly also elevate the purchasing power of the people，allowing them have more choose to follow their heart.

what about future? I think the proportion of domestic car is a clear sign of Social improvement in China, and it will steadily increase in the following decades. In contrast, the rate of foreign car will likely continue to decrease or remain relatively stable.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：what

批改：首字母大写

原文：car

批改：cars

原文：Social

批改：首字母小写

原文：Simultancously

批改：Simultaneously

原文：brand market of domestic car market

批改：the market share of some car brands in China

原文： brand

批改： brands，国产品牌不止一个

原文： brand

批改： brands

原文：Janpan brand

批改：Japanese brands

原文：The bar chart depicts the brand market of domestic car market during 2008 to 2009. In 2008, the percentage of domestic brand was approximately 25%, but by 2009 this rate had substantially risen to around 32%. Meanwhile, the proportion of American brand experienced a significant decline of about 10% during the same period. Simultancously, the percentage of Janpan brand remained stable and steady.

批改：开头信息清晰简洁

原文：to

批改：改为and

原文：of

批改：删除，无需of

原文：satisfication

批改：satisfaction

原文：chinese

批改：首字母大写

原文：the economic growth rapidly

批改：rapid economic growth

原文：elevate

批改：elevates单数

原文：the

批改：不用the

原文：have more choose

批改：allowing them to have more choices

原文：The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows, To start with, in the wake of the high-speed improvement of society, people"s attitude towards of consumption have undergone significant changes. People are no longer content with material satisfication, they also pursue Chinese national spirit.This explains why an increasing number of people choose domestic cars rather than foreign cars. In addition, chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the great progress made by China"s manufacturing industry. And the economic growth rapidly also elevate the purchasing power of the people，allowing them have more choose to follow their heart.

批改：注意拼写和语法错误

原文： car

批改：cars复数

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：9/15分。

1.作文内容包含全面，主题明确，层次分明，扣分主要是拼写、动词名词混用和单复数；

2.运用老师讲的复杂语法结构和高级词汇问题不大，碰到自己写的句子容易出错，说明需要再提高一下语法能力；

3.采用恰当的衔接手法，内容较为连贯；

4.要多内化老师讲的高分词汇和模板句型，形成自己的语料库和写作思路，加油！

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