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2021年考研英语一大作文失分点批改

本文是一份经过启航教育整理的2021年考研英语一大作文批改资料,对照考研英语作文话题写作框架与评分标准进行精细讲解。无论是词汇句式、段落衔接还是逻辑展开,本文都能为考研英语考生提供可直接套用的范例。

一、2021年考研英语一大作文题目

考研英语一2021年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the picture below. In your essay, you should1)describe the picture briefly, 2)interpret the implied meaning, and 3)give your comments. Write your answer on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、2021年考研英语一大作文批改例文

As shown in the picture, there is a child telling his father that many classmates consider playing traditional opera tell him that his hobby is very boring, And his father tells him that it"s enough if child enjoy it.Evidently, the picture intends to convey that pursuing our hobby plays an important role in our personal lifes and society.

The phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but both of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, in modern society full of changes and challenges, keeping ourselves has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordinary people, and its significance has become increasingly evident. It is a valuable virtue in current society, which can nurture our soul, and promote growth and self-fulfillment instead of being consuming. Furthermore, the quality of not being affected by others benefits to growths of teenagers. It is a driving force stems from teenagers,desires to do what they want to do, and embrace a brighter future.

In brief, we should advocate keeping ourselves. Only by doing so can we fulfill our aspirations.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文:onsider playing traditional opera tell him

批改: 结构混乱,删除冗余动词 “tell”,重构为 “think his hobby of learning traditional opera is boring”(“认为他学习传统戏曲的爱好很无聊”)

原文:lifes

批改:“lives”(复数形式)

原文:benefits to

批改:改为 “is beneficial to”(“benefit” 作动词时直接接宾语,“be beneficial to” 为固定搭配)

原文: growths

批改:改为 “growth”(不可数名词)

原文:teenagers,desires

批改:“teenagers’ desire”

原文: shown in the picture, there is a child telling his father that many classmates consider playing traditional opera tell him that his hobby is very boring, And his father tells him that it"s enough if child enjoy it.Evidently, the picture intends to convey that pursuing our hobby plays an important role in our personal lifes and society.

批改:描述图片内容,符合题目要求

原文:The phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but both of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, in modern society full of changes and challenges, keeping ourselves has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordinary people, and its significance has become increasingly evident. It is a valuable virtue in current society, which can nurture our soul, and promote growth and self-fulfillment instead of being consuming. Furthermore, the quality of not being affected by others benefits to growths of teenagers. It is a driving force stems from teenagers,desires to do what they want to do, and embrace a brighter future.

批改:提出了自己的观点,条理较为清晰

原文:In brief, we should advocate keeping ourselves. Only by doing so can we fulfill our aspirations.

批改:总结全文,结尾段可以再适当加一两句话

四、考研英语作文评分

得分:16

原文紧扣 “坚持个人爱好,不受他人看法影响” 的核心主题,框架完整,符合考研英语议论文的基本结构,且能通过 “孩子学传统戏曲” 的具体场景传递观点,具备一定的现实意义。但存在较多一些问题:语法 / 拼写错误频发(如 “lifes”“benefits to”“growths”);写完再整体检查一遍,希望继续努力,加油!

本文的2021年考研英语一高分范文只是启航教育考研英语作文话题写作锦囊的一小部分精华。2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班由斌哥主讲,配套锦囊妙句、写作模板、真题批改、精品图书与社群服务,是考研英语写作冲刺的不二之选。

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