本文是一份经过启航教育整理的2024年考研英语一大作文批改资料，对照考研英语作文万能句型写作框架与评分标准进行精细讲解。无论是词汇句式、段落衔接还是逻辑展开，本文都能为考研英语考生提供可直接套用的范例。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand picture, there is a boy walking in the park, standing with a smile, saying that " It is wonderful for building the park beside the home." In the right hand picture, the number of parks in a certain city experienced a significant increase of 204 from 2009 to 2022.

The phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways. but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, modern society is full of changes, chances and challenges, and the harmonious enviroment of citizens is the key to boasting the compreheasive national strength. Also the government issue related laws to propel the number of the city park. on the other hand, neglecting the harmonious environment will hinder our progress, not only depriving the happiness of citizens but also making us negative outlook our life.

Therefore, building park is the catalyst for society and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Only in this way can we make our world share with brilliance.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：t-hand picture, there is a boy walking in the park, standing with a smile, saying that " It is wonderful for building the park beside the home." In the right hand picture, the number of parks in a certain city experienced a significant increase of 204 from 2

批改：第一段成功地将图片和图表信息结合了起来，结构很好

原文：ught-provoking in several ways. but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, modern society is full of changes, chances and challenges, and the harmonious enviroment of citizens is the key to boasting the compreheasive national strength. Also the government issue r

批改：thought-provoking-> thought-provoking​ (拼写错误) enviroment-> environment​ (拼写错误) boasting the compreheasive national strength-> boosting the comprehensive national strength​ (拼写错误，boast常指自夸，boost才是提升) Also the government issue related laws-> Also, the government issues related laws​ (缺少逗号，主谓一致) on the other hand-> On the other hand​ (段落首字母大写) making us negative outlook our life-> 句子结构不完整，可改为 giving us a negative outlook on life

原文： On the one hand, modern society is full of changes, chances and challenges, and the harmonious enviroment of citizens is the key to boasting the compreheasive national strength. Also the government issue related laws to propel the number of the city park. on the other hand, neglecting the harmonious environment will hinder our progress, not only depriving the happiness of citizens but also making us negative outlook our life.

批改： 本段从正反两个方面分析原因，思路是好的。但需要注意论证的聚焦性。第二个论点（忽视和谐环境的危害）与图表“公园数量增加”这一积极现象的关联不够直接。建议将重点放在解释现象发生的原因上，而不是其反面。可以更具体地阐述公园提供的和谐环境如何直接提升公民幸福感和综合国力，以及政府法规如何具体促进了公园建设。

原文：ilding park is the catalyst for society and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Only in this wa

批改：building park-> building parks​ (名词复数) society and personal development-> societal and personal development​ (societal比 society更常用作形容词)

原文：, building park is the catalyst for society and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Only in this way can we make our world share with

批改： 结尾段总结了公园建设的重要性，并使用了比喻，这很好

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：16

你的作文已经具备了良好的框架。下一步的提升可以聚焦在两个方面：

论证的聚焦性：在分析原因时，确保每个论点都直接解释“公园数量增加”这一积极现象发生的原因，而不是论述其反面的危害。

语言的精准度：特别注意拼写、名词单复数和固定搭配。这是清晰、表达的基础。

本文的2024年考研英语一高分范文只是启航教育考研英语作文万能句型写作锦囊的一小部分精华。2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班由斌哥主讲，配套锦囊妙句、写作模板、真题批改、精品图书与社群服务，是考研英语写作冲刺的不二之选。